ONE HUNDRED THINGS I HAVE LEARNED, BY ACCCEPTING THE TRUTH ABOUT MYSELF, & HUMANITY - (AB)

First, a "don't pull the trigger" warning!

Please be advised the following subjects are included: Explicit sexual details - Sexual shaming

Would you take advice from someone who has been married twice, constantly picked the wrong men, or left the right ones? Would you listen to someones advice if you felt they constantly put themselves in bad situations? Maybe you should, lessons only come from mistakes.

What I have learned in 12 months - that I wish I knew earlier.

1. That your "type" is rarely what you want or need to be happy.

2. That if their speech and actions do not align, then the words they use are called "lies".

3. If they say they "love you" but they are not beside you when you cry, they do not understand the world love.

4. They don’t care how you feel, if you tell them you need them and they walk away.

5. If you open your heart to it, love is always possible.

6. You have to risk it all if you want to win big.

7. That respect, support, and empathy are worth more than money, fame, and beauty ever will be.

8. You are not your age or your past, if you are happy. But if you are scared, angry and jealous, you are both.

9. Beauty is a candle and God is a vicious arsonist.

10. You are always you, no matter what it looks like on the outside, feels like on the inside, or seems like in your head, you are always inside the packaging someplace.

11. Sex is wasted in our youth, and should be celebrated when we have aged enough to do it properly.

12. Laughter has the same value as all the gold & diamonds in the world.

13. Trust is easily broken by those who don’t value it in the first place, and it can’t be fixed by lone workers.

14. People can be good for lots of reasons, but people seem to behave badly for the same few excuses.

15. Some people choose to harm you, and know that it will change you for the worst. They don’t care.

16. Kisses and cuddles can be faked, but the feeling you get in your gut, cannot.

17. Grown adults who are kind, know that problems are solved by communicating, not name calling.

18. If you have less than 90% peace and calm in your relationship, the other 10% is telling you to re-think.

19. People who are frustrated with their own inability to work on themselves, use anger and violence so they don’t have to change. 

20. Everyone’s behaviour is a choice, every decision they made was considered, excuses are just lies that made sense.

21. There is no standard description for a "real" man, they come in all ages, sizes and styles. 

22. Look for kindness first, then the rest will follow.

23. If it feels forced, it is.

24. If it feels like you are doing all the work, you are.

25. If they take the time to consider the words before saying them, they are thinking of you as much as they are themselves.

26. If you are trying to find an explanation to convince yourself they didn’t mean it, they probably did.

27. Very few people are worth chasing, match their effort, never surpass it.

28. Accept your faults, admit them, if you control them, then you are not the problem.

29. A fumble without feelings, is worth 1% of intimacy with love.

30. A good man respects you, no matter what, and with no exceptions.

31. People appear and disappear from your life for a reason, respect that and don’t ask them back in.

32. Tell your truth, no matter how shameful or embarrassing, and you will always be trusted.

33. Telling a lie, is high stakes gambling, with everything you enjoy.

34. You are always stronger than you imagine is possible, today won’t beat you, nor will tomorrow.

35. Allow yourself time, it is yours to give yourself and no ones to take.

36. It is possible for two opposing facts to be true, he may be the "one", but he could also be bad news.

37. People will do anything for power, hold on to yours as best you can.

38. Sleep isn’t always the problem, sometimes it’s your soul that needs rest.

39. You can be both a slut, and a romantic, at the same time.

40. Depression is like a funfair mirror, everything seems distorted when you look through it.

41. Money gives you clues to people’s morals, if they never have any, and you always do, who is doing all the work?

42. Let The Ship Sink - stand back sometimes and let nature take its course.

43. Being the "bigger person" is essentially being the only casualty in a world war. 

44. If you think you saw it, you did see it, so ask yourself why they insist you didn’t.

45. Work out who has what to gain, that usually leads to reality.

46. If you are outside in tears, and they are on the inside looking out, they want you to stay there.

47. Happiness is both a feeling and a state of mind, neither can be faked or bought.

48. Infatuation knocks loudly,  real love has no bells or whistles.

49. The best place to be, is where you can be completely yourself.

50. Authentic is a choice, and an underrated compliment.

51. You cannot be brave, if you have no fear.

52. Stupidity is a disease easily contracted by those who hang around it.

53. If you have to drag up the past to win a battle, it was never in the past at all.

54. Forgiveness, support, encouragement - these are not just words.

55. When someone is interested in you, it is obvious, and the same applies if they are not.

56. People take parts of you that you can never get back, in the hope of fixing themselves.

57. You cannot change the laws of nature, and you cannot fix anyone else.

58. A rotten apple may not have chosen to rot, but it is the same as if I did.

59. Everyone sees the truth in everything, but most choose to applaud the version that suits them best.

60. People who are called "whores" and "slags" are the most likely to be desperate for love and affection.

61. If you have to rely on a made up story to tell me how to live, your very definition of ‘truth’ betrays your ignorance.

62. Every human I ever saw or met just wants to get through today.

63. No one puts their child in the boat, if they were safer on the land.

64. No one identifies as a target for hate, because they need ‘attention’.

65. No one knows the complete truth.

66. I’ve never met a journalist or politician who had a complete set of morals.

67. Lots of people that should care, do not care at all. We are living in an epidemic of apathy.

68. A true friend will ply a vodka bottle out of your hands one day, and put one in them the next.

69. The only person who knows what you need, is you. Listen and take notes when the expert speaks.

70. There is no such thing as coincidence it happened when it was supposed to, so trust it.

71. To make a human, you need equal parts intelligence, ability, emotions, talent and empathy, the recipe does not include ‘other people’s perceptions’.

72. Dogs are the higher achy of angles.

73. Technology lets us do simple things, in a more complex way.

74. Listening to music and scrolling your phone whilst walking, may explain why you feel so detached and empty all the time.

75. There is no news media view, only the opinions of those causing the problems.

76. You cannot have fashion, you cannot have trend, but you can have style.

77. Good sex is started days before you cum, it involves the mind more than the flesh, and happens when you are at peace with yourself.

78. Boys who look wholesome and innocent, are the ones with the dirtiest thoughts.

79. Age is defined not by what you’ve already done, but what you are prepared to do next.

80. Travel, uneducated thoughts about people can be changed when you get to see the evidence yourself.

81. When you cry, you are washing out the stains on your heart. Rinse it often.

82. A dog can offer a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and a ball to play with, each have equal value.

83. When you are ready, tell your story, it should be celebrated not hidden.

84. Don’t put yourself first, if you do nobody wins but you! Protect yourself instead.

85. If heaven is offering a "centre parks" type Eden, ask yourself why everyone is still sinning?

86. There are no sins and no commandments, the truth is no one has the instructions, and we are playing blind.

87. Food is the glue that holds society together. 

88. Anyone who needs lies to be heard, isn’t worth listening to when they tell the truth either.

89. Make friends, but just a handful. Water a few good flowers, not a whole garden of weeds.

90. If you can say anything to one person, and know they would listen to understand, you have achieved next level humanity goals.

91. If someone truly loves you, you will know. Let them, even if it’s from afar.

92. Trust yourself fully, but no one else that much.

93. You will know when you are enjoying your life, when you don’t have to ask yourself anymore.

94. Stop making excuses for others, they know what they did, and so do you.

95. If you speak up when people do bad things, bad things stop happening around you.

96. We all wear armour, mine stops strangers accessing my soul, they are called ‘sunglasses’.

97. If you want a deeper connection to someone, look them in the eye and tell them what you are feeling in that moment.  

98. People that leave concerts early to avoid the traffic, are as much of the problem as people who stand up immediately when a plane lands. 

99. Of the places I have travelled in the world, the happiest people lived the simplest of lives.

100. Choice isn’t a right, nor a privilege, it is more commonly a hindrance.